Gonna write this post in English. Why English? Because I can’t speak or write France, Spanish, let alone ngapak Tegal-ish. The next reason is because this post is gonna be kinda emotional, which I truly hard to find the comfortable words in Bahasa.
Here we go.
So, it is the end of 2011. The year I’ve been very grateful of. The year of change. The year I stepped a lot further I just can’t believe it myself.
It’s not hard to find the highlight this year is my marriage. Half of the year I’ve spent all my energy preparing this. Eventhough my wedding was not involving so much traditional ceremonies, but it still demands a lot of attention and details it leads me a total weariness. I’ve heard a lot that preparing wedding means firing up the drama, but words are words if you don’t undergo it yourself. I’ve cried so much during this preparation, my relationship with my mother was getting worse, and I’ve lost confidence a lot that I can’t handle everything by myself. Let alone I feel so tired because I haven’t had vacation for two years during my job probation. I was overburden.
But when the day comes, I feel like the rain of relief on me. It was like everything’s flashing before my eyes and I realized, “here it is….” My life finally begins… I’ve spent half a year being occupied that I ran a lot of things to be grateful. And by June, half of 2011, I woke up to the half of remaining of the year, of so much beautiful things.
First, the man I’ve always dreamed of. I’ve drowned so much in the hecticness of preparing wedding that I forgot I DID THIS TO BE WITH HIM. It’s like I lost the bigger picture. When it’s over, finally I can see that the pain I underwent was worthy: the unconditional love, the patience, the cuddles, the laughter, the silliness and everything we share together. I’m so grateful it’s him, not anyone else. I never thought being a wife would feel this lovely.
Also started half of this year, I was finally given the opportunity to travel. Travel, vacation, holiday, or what-the-name is the thing I’ve been always dreamed of but the chances never came. June 2011, not also I finally have a morning flight to Bali like I always wanted, but God decided to give me more; a vacation with a wonderful husband. Now I see why holiday feels so delayed for me; because He wants to make it very special :)
September 2011, with my friends, I also finally have a chance to have a holiday in a country I’ve never expected it before. Bangkok, Thailand is a second city overseas that I’ve visited (according to my passport, I have visited Singapore in 2007). I experienced the joy of staying in a hostel, shopping in one of famous market in the world, Chatuchak, and strolling around the city by water transportation. Sounds simple, but in every travelling journey I’ve found something, some satisfaction that a stuff can’t replace and can’t be explained.
The last six months of 2011 I feel so energized, so charged, that I did something I’ve never thought I would. So I cook and took photos (and even blog about it). I don’t know, I just do, and it’s an instant happiness for me!
Oh my God, I babbled so much, did I?
Guess in 2011 I feel so enlightened I can’t stop telling stories about it :D. But life has it ups and downs. 2011 not only contains happy stories, but also unpleasant ones.
Until now, I have some broken relationship with some people. Some very significant, some finally I know they’re not that significant *giggle*. With the significant ones, I just realized that our relationship has been broken a very long ago and it’s not easy to fix. In 2012, I have a goal to repair this. And for the people that finally revealed that you’re not that significant, I’m very grateful I finally can cut the crap with you :)
Some more unpleasant story: I’m also still dealing with insomnia. It started out in 2009, getting worse when preparing my wedding, somewhat cured in this last six months, but sometimes it relapsed. I tried to cut the caffeine, add more veggies to my menu and work out more to make it gone forever.
I’m so happy I can finish this post. It’s been a long time I didn’t write this long. I hope in 2012 I will enjoy the whole year, not only half like I did in 2011 :D But I already took some steps in the end of the year. I’m quitting my job but thankfully, new exciting opportunity has been waiting for me. One lovely house in suburban area also already awaits for me and my husband to be occupied. Yes, I’m starting my new life, the first time separated with my parents! I bet it’s not gonna be easy in the first times, but I know it’s gonna be awesome.
Cherish to lovable 2011. You’ve been great. Thank you!